Thursday, 14 July 2011

"A Fuck Friend "

Was reading an "interesting" "scientific" article today about the lives of celibates in Europe.
Seems that since "love" and "relationships" have become so complicated, the European celibates opt for a North American import called a "fuck friend".

Basically or basi (as Jerry Springer says), a "fuck friend" is someone whom you fuck on a quasi regular basis, with the implicit/explicit understanding that the relationship remains on the level of "sexual hygiene".

Now this gets really "interesting". Sexual hygiene in this context has got nothing to do with STD's, or cleanliness of the genitalia. By sexual hygiene is meant "regular sexual release".

You see if you want a "hygienic life" you need to look for a life partner, short of that, a "fuck friend" will do.

That article then based itself on several case studies of men and women who "used" "fuck friends" for "sexual hygiene".

And this is the modus operandi :

- with a "fuck friend " minimal talk is required : text messages whenever your libido needs a hygienic cleaning will suffice. No need for conversation, dialogue, meeting of minds... all that unnecessary pragmatism

- with a "fuck friend " expenditure is kept at a low cost, meaning you are under no obligation to share meals, drinks, or any other form of appetizers...economic pragmatism.

- with a "fuck friend " the agenda is clear, to the point, squeezed in between your heavy timetable, no explanations required...time is money pragmatism.

- with a "fuck friend" you may indulge in long term sex, assuming it is hot sex (a condition for the "fuck friend" "spirit") provided that no attachment of any sort, ensues. Apart of course from an attachment at the genital level until a better option presents itself...sexual pragmatism.

- a "fuck friend" implicitly understands, (and it is theoretically a mutual understanding) that the day you will find THE partner (fit enough to be yours), the "fuck friend" shall disappear from your life...relational pragmatism.

This "utilitarian" approach to sex may come off as a reasonable short term measure/remedy for a loveless life. However, upon a closer look, this approach denotes nothing but a fear of Love and Intimacy...

And fearful people make lousy lovers.

P.S: for all the CUNTS that used to mind my use of the FUCK word, here it is amply used in one of your "scientific" journals. Just thought I'd mention it.