I am bracing myself or trying to, for tough days ahead, not allowing to let things get out of control, constantly putting them back in perspective, re-placing them in the grand scheme of things, re-arranging them so as they do not take up the whole place, all the space...
But it's tough. It's been tough and has not eased much. I was hoping with time and some distance it would...but it has not.
It is persistent - a bit like some strict teacher always pushing me back into self reflection and not allowing me space for vagaries...a bit like an unwanted guest that overstays his time and invades my hours, a bit like some dependent lover who is constantly craving my attention...a bit like a demanding god who is never satisfied...
I am sure there is more to it...one of my secret fantasies, my secret wish is to crack open the coding behind it all, maybe then the tough days will mellow under the Sun Light.
Yes am hoping.
