Thursday 3 March 2011

A Manual On How To Become Perfect.

This is a manual specially written for women. You must be absolutely perfect. Always, totally perfect, for ever and ever...till the hour of your death and beyond...even in your grave...only then will you be approved of, only then maybe, I said maybe, you will be recognized for who you are...no wait, for who you were...no wait...

These are tips for you, good advice, that you ought to memorize perfectly by heart and repeat daily like those uplifting affirmations...meditate on them deeply and put them into practice immediately.

- Give, give and give some more. Expect nothing in return, zero, ziltch. Your mission in life is to be a giver only. Give everything and give everything up in the process. Your love, your affection, your understanding, your patience, your sanity, your time, your energy, your body, your well being, your health, your wealth...anything you've got --- sacrifice it damn it, sacrifice even your life, because you'll be so much worthier of a person, of a human being.

- Never ask questions. Never. Whatever you are told, accept and believe. Specially from the men in your lives. Don't ever ever doubt them. Ever. Whatever doubts or suspicions rise in your soul, banish them... whatever inklings come from the voice within you, silence them. Whatever incongruence, cues, signals...ignore them, censor them. Never question his integrity, his worth, his value, his behavior, his attitude, his omissions, his secrets, his skeletons in locked closets....never question him. Ever.

- Listen, always listen...never fail to listen, always...listen and listen some more...attentively, with interest, with passion, with awe, with admiration...even if you are saturated, even if you are tired, even if you are ill, even if you are on your fucking death bed, it does not matter, you are not important, keep on listening...and if the urge to speak, talk, grabs you, be merciless with it...simply shut up and listen.

- Physically...physically, never ever underestimate the importance of physically...Your body, your face, your hands, your nails, your legs, your arms, your stomach, your breasts, your hair...your appearance, everything, everything must be perfect, always, at all times, under any circumstances...You are not allowed any spots, blemishes, wrinkles, cellulite, extra kilo, flab, spider veins, cuticles, split ends, extra hair....anything out of the perfect measurements is forbidden. You are to be smooth, silky, spotless, soft, fresh, exfoliated, polished, vivacious, jovial, always, remember ALWAYS.

- Sex, you are all waiting to hear about sex. This is the most important part. Let me give it to you in one sentence. You are a sexual slave and if you are not by now, then you must become.
Your body is his temple...his play field...you are to allow him anything and everything, at all times, whenever he wants, whenever he desires, whenever he fancies...anything he asks of you, do not ever ever turn him down. Stay tuned in to his needs. I don't care what you are feeling, or going through...all of this is immaterial, irrelevant. And remember your pleasure, your desires, your wants, your needs, are not important...only he counts, only he matters. Don't ever forget that.

- Never, ever, reproach him, criticize him, get angry with him, be impatient with him, you are to massage his ego, his feet, his balls, whatever he asks of you, massage it...drop anything you are doing and just obey his demands, his whims, his capriciousness...even if he takes you for granted, even if he is inconsiderate, insensitive, out of control, erratic, reckless, unfaithful, disloyal, insane, mad, abusive, violent... it does not matter...keep praising him, you must be grateful to have him, always grateful. Keep smiling, keep nodding, keep talking softly, keep being nice, keep being loving, keep being forgiving, keep being forbearing, keep being understanding, keep being supportive, keep being kind, keep being generous, keep being happy, you must be grateful and happy, it is an order, be grateful and happy with whatever he dishes your way.

Of course, this is not the end of the lesson...I can keep on adding more, but I want you to memorize that part first...and don't worry, we will always find someone to place a few flowers on your tomb.